Setting Boundaries Is Healthy, No Matter Who You Upset (A Rant)

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Hey Sensational Soul!

If you’re anything like me, you don’t like to upset others. In fact, harmony is more important to you than ruffling other people’s feathers.

However…

You wake up sometimes and you think to yourself, “I’m ALWAYS giving in some shape or form and people just keep taking from me! I’m so exhausted of this and I’m ready to just hide from the entire world!”

I felt this way for years, and I do mean YEARS. Then I decided I needed to examine WHY I was allowing others to take advantage of me, take me for granted, and just keep taking from me altogether.

And this is what I’ve learned:

▪ Pleasing everyone around you is NOT going to make them happy. In fact, it makes them even more greedy in their need to be supplied with whatever it is they want from you. You give them an inch and they want a mile. You give them a mile and they want 100 miles. It’s a cyclical form of self-sabotage that leads you FURTHER AWAY from your own self-love. Sure, I know, you are going to make up an excuse such as, “But so and so needs me to do this…” Whatever, you don’t love yourself and it shows.
▪ Putting others before yourself is actually going to make things WORSE for you and for others. But how? It’s because you set unrealistic expectations towards others when you put them before yourself. And this leads to lack of respect that you so crave from others BECAUSE they know they can turn to you at ANY point in time, for ANYthing. You’re now the “welcome” mat you didn’t realize you have become until it got all muddy and peed on from dogs passing by while on their walk.
▪ Being the person who “saves the day” for everyone else drains your energy and makes you a cranky soul no one wants to be around- and then you end up feeling lonely because no one wants to be around you because you’re so damn cranky! Yep.

Newsflash, you ARE human. You are NOT a robot, you are not Iron Man, and you are NOT Superman or Batman either. I hate to disappoint you…I would choose Batman; but this is beside the point.

If you are agreeing to a lot of requests by others, you are draining your energy reserve. And when you drain your energy reserve, you don’t have much energy left to take care of yourself. And when you don’t take care of yourself, you get cranky because “the vampires”, as I like to call them, keep wanting to suck your blood/energy from you. Not ALL vampires are as enjoyable to be around as Count Dracula on Sesame Street…

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I’ve been there. I’ve most definitely been there. And I needed a HUGE wake-up call

Most people don’t realize their 1 or 2 requests are being multiplied by 30 or more people/situations on a daily basis. So, of course, they don’t realize that you are smiling and nodding “yes” when inside you are wishing and praying, “If only I could manifest a 20-minute nap” each day. This brings me to this question:

Are you getting enough sleep at night? Probably not. I’m in the same boat, sometimes.

So, what can you do to turn this all around?

▪ Before you RESPOND to an email, to someone in person, or to them over the phone, tell them you will get back to them soon because you need to check your schedule. And then really think about it asking yourself, “Do I REALLY want to do this for this person? Or, am I just wanting to say ‘yes’ so that way I don’t upset them?”
▪ Understand that no matter how much you please others, you are NEVER going to be able to make EVERYONE happy. I mean, just last night I blocked some negative asshole on social media because he decided to drink the negative Kool-Aid and was spamming my social media page with rude comments and gestures.

So, I put my foot down on social media (along with a cheeky and funny photo quote) warning everyone that I WILL block their ass if they come onto my page and spam my page with rudeness and negativity (I don’t do that to their pages). Well, one person (not the person I blocked) actually blocked ME after leaving a response stating they didn’t like my “temper tantrum”.

Cue…what’s the phrase? Oh, “Byyyyeeee, Felicia!”

Listen, I don’t care who you are, if you’re going to be rude TO me, I’m just going to block you because “ain’t nobody got time for that.”

Why try to please people who cannot understand that it’s actually a GOOD THING to have healthy boundaries in life? Yes, I am here to help people, we all have our gifts we share with the world; but this doesn’t mean I should stand for bullying. HELL NO!

You can’t please everyone, and you really shouldn’t WANT to please everyone, anyway. Own yourself, you are a total badass at life and you DO deserve the self-respect you maintain FOR your own soul. Which brings me to my next point…

▪ You can’t pour from an empty cup. If you are spending most of your time each day tending to others’ needs, you won’t have any time for yourself and to refuel your OWN energy. And after a while this leads to a train-wreck (i.e.- you, wall, you hit wall, you fall down).

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What to do instead?

PACE YOURSELF. Utilize a calendar on your phone and space out each task, each day. For example, I perform my Mastering Your Mindset journaling each day and I allot myself at least 5-10 minutes each day to do it. And then I allow myself 30 minutes or so to respond to emails/messages, an hour and a half for blogging, etc. (space it all out).

Also, when you pace yourself and spread things out on your calendar, you are not only more likely to STICK to completing them; but you are also more confident in replying to a request to help set the necessary healthy boundary in place, “Let me check my schedule and I will get with you soon!”

And then you look at your calendar and buy yourself some time to figure out:

1) do I really want to do this? Or, am I just saying “yes” because I don’t want to upset others?

And

2) where can I fit this in my day and on what day (BECAUSE I really want to do this)?

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Before last year I had NO CLUE what it meant to have healthy boundaries in place for myself. And then I woke up after feeling completely drained and just plain irritable. Not to mention that I had a health scare and was ordered “to rest” for a week. I’m happy to say my blood pressure is in good condition, thanks TO setting healthy boundaries. BONUS! I lost 21 lbs. when I took back my OWN power and put my self-love and care FIRST. No gym required.

When you live by your own healthy boundaries you put into place, you start to feel calmer, happier, more at ease, in flow, and in alignment. And then everything you want to manifest comes more rapidly BECAUSE you are emitting calmer, happier, more at ease, in flow, and in alignment vibes into the Universe stating, “more of these types of blessings, please!”

I strongly urge you to re-evaluate your thought and behavioral patterns if you are feeling overworked, overstretched, and completely drained of your energy.

And for your Mastering Your Mindset journaling, ask yourself the following and journal out your answer at least 5 times:

▪ WHY am I constantly feeling stressed/tired/anxious/nervous/etc.?
▪ WHAT could I be thinking/feeling and doing INSTEAD in order to fulfill my self needs and self-love?

It’s time to get more in touch with your soul’s wants and needs, Baby!

Until next time…

Change Your Mindset & You Change Your Life,

Journal Girl Jaclyn

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Calling In Your Dream Career

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Hey Sensational Soul!

Having your dream job and BEING in your dream career is super-flow of soul-energy alignment. Having, being, and doing your soul’s purpose work is what gets you up each morning, it’s what excites you as you embark upon new adventures throughout its course. BEING in your dream job IS happening and it’s happen RIGHT NOW.

Every Friday in the Manifest It! group I give SUPER MIND-BLOWING SHIFTING training. Here is a sneak peak of this week’s!

Journal out the following:

1) When I think of myself doing and BEING in my dream career, what kind of thoughts and feelings come up for me in general? Answer this question at least 10 times and start the sentence: when I think of myself being/doing…I think…I feel…

2) When I FEEL into BEING in my dream career, what do I ENVISION myself doing each day (both in my career and in my at-home/lifestyle behaviors)? Answer at least 20 times and start the sentence: I am…

3) Answer yourself in this question: The reason why I am not in my dream career right now is because…

4) What could I do to change my reason(s)? Play the lawyer and sway your mindset jury into believing your soul’s TRUE verdict of your newly created reality going forward. Answer at least 10 times and start the sentence: I can change my stories of my reasons why by…

5) Using the present day as a reference point, what can I start DOING to help me move closer to BEING in my dream career?

Do I need to take classes? Hire someone? Create a portfolio? Build my resume (both electronically and on paper)? Start joining groups on LinkedIn that are in the same field or in a similar field? There is a plethora of online resources, both paid and free! You have the power at your fingertips!

What can I start DOING right now to help propel me and vibrate those powerful particles to communicate to the Universe: more of this, please? Brainstorm and answer this question at least 3 times.

6) And you guessed it…now you get to go DO these 3 things you answered in number 5! Come on, you CAN do this! Gain some knowledge around your dream career, continue envisioning yourself BEING and DOING, and EXISTING in your soul’s purpose work because THIS IS WHAT YOU ARE MEANT TO DO, BE, and LIVE while on this planet. Do one of them TODAY, this weekend, NOW. Plug in the remaining 2 knowledge gaining/inspirational actions into your calendar and DO them when the alarm goes off to remind you next week and weekend. I believe in you!

Embrace Yourself- Even If You Make Multiple Changes

Even if you go into the direction of your dream career and you have a change of heart- no big deal AT ALL! This just means you’ve gained MORE CLARITY around what it is you are calling into your soul’s purpose work. This is a GOOD thing if you change course. Do you know that the average person changes their career every 6-7 years? We are human, this is completely NORMAL to shift UP and SHIFT into your soul-aligned purpose work.

Changes are good, changes bring in MORE blessings. Changes level you the fuck UP in life. Changes ALLOW for your manifestations to come into your physical realm more quickly- as long as you are taking inspirational actions that feel GOOD to your soul, you ARE moving in the RIGHT direction. You’ve got this!

Do this DAILY, consistency and repetition totally pay off! You will and you already ARE shifting into newly empowering mindset beliefs! Yes! I love it!

Unleash your soul, unleash your freedom

Journal Girl Jaclyn

PS: Unblock Into MORE Money!’s doors are CLOSING at MIDNIGHT, TONIGHT, Central. Last call!

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Next Week Is Your Last Week On Earth

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Next week is your last week here on earth. What kind of thoughts come to you? How does this leave you feeling? You have one week left on this earth. What will you do? Who will you BE?

When you transcend within this Universe, your “material” possessions do not go with you. Your “money” doesn’t go with you. Your “family” and “friends” do not go with you. You are energy. It is within you, always. Everything around you is energy.

Everything IS energy. Everything IS within you, already.

We all know we are going to transcend sooner or later. We all know that our time on this precious planet is limited in the physical form. We all know this. We all trust that this is the truth.

We all accept it as truth.

So why are we so worried and stressed about all of the “material” things on this planet? It is because we are seeking from the outside rather than seeking from within. It is because we are looking to other humans to fix FOR us rather than understanding, expanding, and accepting that everything IS the Universe.

Everything comes from the Universe. Everything IS you, and you ARE everything.

The Universe is always the way, your trust and faith in the Universe is always the way. Your communication with your soul and your mindset thoughts and beliefs communicate TO the Universe, and all 3 work together simultaneously…and THIS is the way.

What do you want your legacy to be from your time on this planet?

What do you want your memories to be while you progress during your time on earth?

What does your soul truly want during your physical time here?

How do you want to give back to the Universe, help this planet, and impact the souls inhabiting the earth?

Everything is an exchange of energy: from your thoughts and emotions emitting vibrations into the Universe, to the Universe giving back to you what your thoughts and emotions emitted- full circle.

Karma: what you do unto others is done unto you. What you reap you sow. What you give out comes back to you. What you CHOOSE is given back to you. What you DECIDE is given back to you. What you BELIEVE is given back to you. What you DO is given back to you.

Everything is an exchange of energy. How do you want your physical life this next week to be? What do you want to focus on? What do you want to do because the only certainty of this world is that anything and everything exists all at the same time within this Universe.

Your physical form is transcending this next week.

What is your SOUL guiding you to think, feel, believe, and do? How do you give to all existence? How do you leave your legacy? How do you create your memories? How do you truly live and BE?

I was walking my dog these last few nights and I frequently looked up at Mars in its clear, bright-red glow. I kept thinking about how our beings could quite possibly exist on this planet one day. Everything stems from the mind. We do not give ourselves enough credit of the power we truly hold as IS of who we ARE.

The home you live in was once a vision brought into physical existence. The car you drive was once a vision brought into physical existence. The plane you ride in was once a vision brought into physical existence. Anything and everything exists all at once within the Universe.

Those who had these visions took their scary steps of inspired actions and no matter what they KEPT GOING. They kept going and they kept taking their soul-inspired steps towards their manifestations.

Everything stems from our mind. Everything stems from our vision. Everything stems from our beliefs. Everything stems from our actions. Everything exists all at the same time in any and every way.

This next week is your last week here on earth. What kind of thoughts come to you now? How does this leave you feeling now? You have one week, this week, left on this earth. What will you do now?

Who ARE you?

Don’t Feel Stuck! The VIP Manifest It! Group

I’ve opened the doors to my VIP Manifest It! Group for $27 for a 6-month subscription. Are you in?

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Think Of It This Way: Money Shifted Its Energy In 5000 B.C.

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Before then people bartered things like bags of rice and beans. And then commodities such as salt, tea, and tobacco began to be exchanged. THEN metal objects began to be used as “money”.

Read the quote again. I’m just going to let this all sink in for you.

Oh, and air equals money.

Carpe Diem!

Journal Girl Jaclyn

PS- Below is a preview of my book currently being edited right now about manifesting your ideal relationship! I’m so excited for its publishing date!

The Beauty of Science & Spirituality

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Hey Sensational Soul!

In science physicists are studying LOGIC and HOW all of the “pieces” fit together; however, most of them still have FAITH in a higher power.

It’s ALL the same and it’s ALL working TOGETHER, simultaneously.

Stop trying and just ALLOW the energy magic to FLOW into your soul’s sphere because it’s ALL existing at the SAME time. Set your intentions and what you focus on expands.

You’ve got this!

Carpe Diem!

Journal Girl Jaclyn

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